So, I have been doing great in the last couple of days.
I guess I should live an alcoholics life, the “live one day at the time” thing. That may sound lame… like all cliche sayings. But I’ve noticed that cliche sayings suck when you just hear them around and don’t really know what they mean. Once it happens to you and you try to express what you feel inside, it turns out that somebody else expressed it before, it just got so popular that it became stupid. Like when you repeat a word for a couple dozen times, it just stops making sense.
I need to take this all calmly, because I have to do a lot of things to achieve what I want, and it’s overwhelming. And when I think of everything at the same time, it feels impossible, and I feel powerless to fight that impossibility. And I end up doing nothing. The worst thing is, next time I have to fight something, I remember how I didn’t succeed the last time, and it makes me break down again, and it all goes on like a circle.
People’s comments usually don’t help either, most people will try to discourage you, maybe because they’re jealous, maybe because they really don’t know what they’re doing, or maybe they just care too much about you and know you would be much safer if you just stay the way you are. And I, from all people, tend to listen too much to what people says. Maybe I should stop.
Anyway, to cut off the seriousness… I did the unthinkable and joined a Gym. Really. It’s really weird because I’m not a Gym person (AT ALL), but I was feeling really weak. College work requires me to be sitting 10 hours a day, standing 8 hours a day,and lying down 6 hours a day. It started as a plan with 2 friends, “oh cool there’s a gym there, lets just ask how much is it”, and then “Um, k lets try it… “, and then we paid for it, and the next day the 2 guys got streptococcal pharyngotonsillitis, and are lying in bed ever since. But me and my super immune system have been actually going on for 3 days now. My whole body hurts in a way I can’t really tell if I did get the pharyngotonsillitis or it’s just the exercise.
Gyms have funny people too. And I confirmed I’m really scared of muscle guys… I see one and I can’t get it, I feel like they’re just wearing some inflatable suit and there’s a normal guy inside… I can’t get those are their real muscles and their body, it’s disturbing.
Oh, in other news, I’m about a month from finishing 9th semester. Half way through 5th year…. I’m going to be an intern soon…so damn scary. Well, I’m 2 weeks from finishing the subject that is more time consuming. But I have so much work piled up, that the other 2 weeks are probably going to be even more busy. I’m not worried though, I’ll worry about that work when the time comes. Right now it’s my THREE DAY WEEKEND, and the weekend of my BIRTHDAY. And I’m happy. Just for that. I’ve always loved my birthday.
I also already scheduled an appointment for the hair straightening thing. I’ll be paying a lot… I hope I get results. 😉
Something scary is that the lady in there said I still have some traces of hair coloring on the tips of my hair. I did that coloring like when I was 17… can my hair grow any slower that I haven’t gotten rid of the colored parts?.